Storytelling

I've always admired those wonderful people who could make up stories in their heads, and tell them to their children with adventure and thrilling action.  I've tried.  For a long while, Little Bear's bedtime stories consisted of a little frog named Rupert who did exciting things.  I think he loved them, but after a few months, my creative juices ran dry and I didn't have any more stories about Rupert left.

It has been two or three years since I've attempted to be a storyteller, but yesterday at snack time I tried again.  Our story started with King Romeo, Queen Juliet, and Prince Fabio.  Episode 1 ended with an action-packed bear attack, and today they will find out the exciting next chapter.  I promised them that every day at snack time we would continue the story.  They were sad yesterday when the story ended, but they are readily anticipating today's snack time after their nap.  They even tried to talk me into storytelling at lunch.  I wanted to keep the snack time tradition, but I agreed to tell them a story from when I was little instead.

I hope this becomes a treasured tradition.

Happy Challenge:

Stories have the ability to transport us to new lands and live adventures safely from the comfort of our own homes.  Is there a little one in your life with whom you could begin storytelling?  There's just something magical about watching a child's eyes dance with wonder as you spin for them tales of glory....

Storytelling

I've always admired those wonderful people who could make up stories in their heads, and tell them to their children with adventure and thrilling action.  I've tried.  For a long while, Little Bear's bedtime stories consisted of a little frog named Rupert who did exciting things.  I think he loved them, but after a few months, my creative juices ran dry and I didn't have any more stories about Rupert left.

It has been two or three years since I've attempted to be a storyteller, but yesterday at snack time I tried again.  Our story started with King Romeo, Queen Juliet, and Prince Fabio.  Episode 1 ended with an action-packed bear attack, and today they will find out the exciting next chapter.  I promised them that every day at snack time we would continue the story.  They were sad yesterday when the story ended, but they are readily anticipating today's snack time after their nap.  They even tried to talk me into storytelling at lunch.  I wanted to keep the snack time tradition, but I agreed to tell them a story from when I was little instead.

I hope this becomes a treasured tradition.

Happy Challenge:

Stories have the ability to transport us to new lands and live adventures safely from the comfort of our own homes.  Is there a little one in your life with whom you could begin storytelling?  There's just something magical about watching a child's eyes dance with wonder as you spin for them tales of glory....

Line Upon Line

Yesterday during my scripture study, I read a verse that has always been a favorite, but really spoke to me this time.  2 Nephi 28:30--

For behold, thus saith the Lord God: I will give unto the children of men line upon line, precept upon precept, here a little and there a little; and blessed are those who hearken unto my precepts, and lend an ear unto my counsel, for they shall learn wisdom; for unto him that receiveth I will give more;

And I wondered what line He would give me today, what precept He would bestow. 

Later in the day, His counsel came.  I have been struggling a bit with Little Bug who just loves Miss Muffin so much that he can't leave her alone.  He hugs her and kisses her and squeezes just a little too hard.  He just doesn't quite understand that because she is a baby he must treat her differently.  Every time he gets near, she starts to cry and I spend the next ten minutes trying to separate them, usually to no avail.

Well yesterday was no different.  I was playing referee and prayed to know what the Father would have me do.  After all, He knows more about how to reach my little ones' hearts than I could ever hope to.  The answer came.  I sat Little Bug on my lap and explained to him how he must be ever so gentle with his little sister.  This part was not new; the teaching is ingrained daily.  But this time I added that his little sister is somewhat scared of him and we role-played different ways to be gentle.  I explained that she will love him and be so excited to see him if he is soft and gentle.  He seemed to understand to the best of his 3-year-old ability.  And for the rest of the day, every time he would approach Muffin, I would utter a small reminder, "Remember to be soft so she will love you."  And he was. At least, much more than usual.

It was a line upon line, precept upon precept moment for me, and it made me realize how much the Lord cares about each and every one of our daily needs.  Last night I had the thought to pray for a specific need that I see in each of my children.  Then I pondered what the Lord would have me do.  I can testify that He answered...at least a little line and precept to try for today.  And this morning when I awoke, I thought to myself, "I wonder what line and precept Heavenly Father is going to teach me today."  I happily await the manifestation of His hand....

Happy Challenge:

*Ask the Lord to teach you a small and simple line or precept today, then write it down when it comes.

*Or pray for a specific need you or a loved one may have and wait upon the Lord to give you the line upon line answer you are seeking.

Line Upon Line

Yesterday during my scripture study, I read a verse that has always been a favorite, but really spoke to me this time.  2 Nephi 28:30--

For behold, thus saith the Lord God: I will give unto the children of men line upon line, precept upon precept, here a little and there a little; and blessed are those who hearken unto my precepts, and lend an ear unto my counsel, for they shall learn wisdom; for unto him that receiveth I will give more;

And I wondered what line He would give me today, what precept He would bestow. 

Later in the day, His counsel came.  I have been struggling a bit with Little Bug who just loves Miss Muffin so much that he can't leave her alone.  He hugs her and kisses her and squeezes just a little too hard.  He just doesn't quite understand that because she is a baby he must treat her differently.  Every time he gets near, she starts to cry and I spend the next ten minutes trying to separate them, usually to no avail.

Well yesterday was no different.  I was playing referee and prayed to know what the Father would have me do.  After all, He knows more about how to reach my little ones' hearts than I could ever hope to.  The answer came.  I sat Little Bug on my lap and explained to him how he must be ever so gentle with his little sister.  This part was not new; the teaching is ingrained daily.  But this time I added that his little sister is somewhat scared of him and we role-played different ways to be gentle.  I explained that she will love him and be so excited to see him if he is soft and gentle.  He seemed to understand to the best of his 3-year-old ability.  And for the rest of the day, every time he would approach Muffin, I would utter a small reminder, "Remember to be soft so she will love you."  And he was. At least, much more than usual.

It was a line upon line, precept upon precept moment for me, and it made me realize how much the Lord cares about each and every one of our daily needs.  Last night I had the thought to pray for a specific need that I see in each of my children.  Then I pondered what the Lord would have me do.  I can testify that He answered...at least a little line and precept to try for today.  And this morning when I awoke, I thought to myself, "I wonder what line and precept Heavenly Father is going to teach me today."  I happily await the manifestation of His hand....

Happy Challenge:

*Ask the Lord to teach you a small and simple line or precept today, then write it down when it comes.

*Or pray for a specific need you or a loved one may have and wait upon the Lord to give you the line upon line answer you are seeking.

Escape.

Sometimes we just need an escape.  The demands and pressures of the day fill us up and leave us empty.  Worry consumes us.  Our to-do list seems daunting.  Little ones cry out for attention and love.  Our patience sometimes wears thin.  What is a mother, or anyone, to do?  In the rush around of the daily busyness, we ride round and round a never-ending Ferris wheel.  We long for they day when we can get off, for we believe that in a few weeks, or months, or even years, our life will slow down and will be "back to normal."

But does this ever really happen?  In my personal experience, the answer is rarely, if ever.  New circumstances arrive just as old ones disappear, and there will always be problems and busyness to attend to.  But we can't keep going round and round on the Ferris wheel forever without a break.  Everyday life is enough to make one quite dizzy.

But, there is an answer.  And it's rather simple.

We need to slow.  We need to pause for an interlude of time.  We need to savor.

Have you ever noticed that when riding a Ferris wheel, it stops every so often to let new people on?  At times I have been annoyed at the frequent stops, or even a little terrified when we stop at the highest point.  But in this analogy, these stops are necessary and can be so rewarding.

Of course an escape to a quiet island would be ideal.  But realistic? No.  It's important to take a small vacation somewhere, at sometime during the year.  But oftentimes we feel that this annual vacation isn't enough to meet the demands of the daily. 

Sometimes we can get away for just a day on the weekend for an outing to the mountains, to the beach, a lake, a picnic at the park, or a walk in the countryside.  These small pauses bring serenity and new perspective so we are ready to meet the next week's challenges.  But even these seem few and far between when the grind of work and family life wear us down.

Sleep is another vital pause-button to the equation.  But even nighttime can feel so far away when it's 9:30 in the morning and we are already running on low.

But there is a way we can take an escape, a mental vacation, at any time or place.  Simply retreat to the bedroom, the bathroom, the backyard, or another place of peace.  Close your eyes, focus on your breath, and picture in your mind's eye, a place of peace and tranquility.  It can be the same place every time, or the scene can change from time to time depending on your mood.  For a long while, mine has been a quiet forest with fresh air and the scent of pine needles.  Now it's to the ocean I retreat to hear the waves and sit on the rocks.

Imagine every detail, the sounds, and the smells, the feel of the ground on your bare feet...it's a wonderful way to escape, even if it is for only two minutes.

These mental escapes take little time, but our brain can't decipher too well between the real and imagined.  The peace and tranquility bestowed upon you in your small retreat will carry with you throughout your day...it's an amazing way to stop at the top of the Ferris wheel and view the world around you with fresh wonder...


Happy Challenge:

Retreat today.  Even if it is only for two short minutes.  Go on an imagined vacation to a pristine, tranquil place and let your spirit, mind, and body be invigorated...



image via pinterest

Escape.

Sometimes we just need an escape.  The demands and pressures of the day fill us up and leave us empty.  Worry consumes us.  Our to-do list seems daunting.  Little ones cry out for attention and love.  Our patience sometimes wears thin.  What is a mother, or anyone, to do?  In the rush around of the daily busyness, we ride round and round a never-ending Ferris wheel.  We long for they day when we can get off, for we believe that in a few weeks, or months, or even years, our life will slow down and will be "back to normal."

But does this ever really happen?  In my personal experience, the answer is rarely, if ever.  New circumstances arrive just as old ones disappear, and there will always be problems and busyness to attend to.  But we can't keep going round and round on the Ferris wheel forever without a break.  Everyday life is enough to make one quite dizzy.

But, there is an answer.  And it's rather simple.

We need to slow.  We need to pause for an interlude of time.  We need to savor.

Have you ever noticed that when riding a Ferris wheel, it stops every so often to let new people on?  At times I have been annoyed at the frequent stops, or even a little terrified when we stop at the highest point.  But in this analogy, these stops are necessary and can be so rewarding.

Of course an escape to a quiet island would be ideal.  But realistic? No.  It's important to take a small vacation somewhere, at sometime during the year.  But oftentimes we feel that this annual vacation isn't enough to meet the demands of the daily. 

Sometimes we can get away for just a day on the weekend for an outing to the mountains, to the beach, a lake, a picnic at the park, or a walk in the countryside.  These small pauses bring serenity and new perspective so we are ready to meet the next week's challenges.  But even these seem few and far between when the grind of work and family life wear us down.

Sleep is another vital pause-button to the equation.  But even nighttime can feel so far away when it's 9:30 in the morning and we are already running on low.

But there is a way we can take an escape, a mental vacation, at any time or place.  Simply retreat to the bedroom, the bathroom, the backyard, or another place of peace.  Close your eyes, focus on your breath, and picture in your mind's eye, a place of peace and tranquility.  It can be the same place every time, or the scene can change from time to time depending on your mood.  For a long while, mine has been a quiet forest with fresh air and the scent of pine needles.  Now it's to the ocean I retreat to hear the waves and sit on the rocks.

Imagine every detail, the sounds, and the smells, the feel of the ground on your bare feet...it's a wonderful way to escape, even if it is for only two minutes.

These mental escapes take little time, but our brain can't decipher too well between the real and imagined.  The peace and tranquility bestowed upon you in your small retreat will carry with you throughout your day...it's an amazing way to stop at the top of the Ferris wheel and view the world around you with fresh wonder...


Happy Challenge:

Retreat today.  Even if it is only for two short minutes.  Go on an imagined vacation to a pristine, tranquil place and let your spirit, mind, and body be invigorated...



image via pinterest

Unto the Least of These.

Love is simple, really.  Sometimes it just takes a minute to show just a little extra love.  Like the day not too long ago that after getting my little muffin girl out of her crib, we sat together on the rocking chair for nearly 15 minutes and just rocked.  I gave her a tickle on her arms and legs and face and she sat absolutely motionless.  It was a tender experience for me and I thought how sad it would have been if I had passed over this opportunity and rushed off to the next activity on my to-do list.

Or the day when instead of rushing off to get myself ready, I sat a few extra minutes with my sweetheart on the couch as he studied his scriptures.  He put his arm around me and I snuggled into him.  How tragic if I had missed this small moment of joy.

Or yesterday when my Little Bug was having a hard, tearful day.  He wouldn't talk to me at all about what was bothering him, but just laid on the floor all melancholy.  I prayed as I do every time I have no idea how to reach my little ones' hearts, asking the Father what I should do.  And then an idea came.  "Mommy really needs to blow her nose, it feels all stuffy.  But what should I use to blow my nose?"  No response came from the sad little pile on the floor.  So I continued.  "Maybe...I should use my hairbrush to blow my nose!  Is that a good idea?"  A little grin pulled the corners of his lips upward ever so slightly.  He shook his head just a tiny bit.  "Oh.  Well, then maybe I could use a spoon!  Would that be a good idea?"  This time the smile was real and he shook his head vigorously from his post on the floor.  I continued to suggest silly things until finally I asked him what I should use.  He replied, "Maybe....a paper towel!"  We continued the conversation, me asking him where I could find one and he responding and showing me step by step.  After realizing they were all gone, we had to find more and then the roll wouldn't go on so he showed me how to remove the old tube before trying to put on the new one.  By the time I finally blew my nose, he was full-out laughing and had completely forgotten about whatever it was that was bothering him.

Or lastly, yesterday afternoon when the boredom bug had crept into the household.  Little Bear was playing the iPod and Little Bug was loving Miss Muffin just a little too much.  She was not liking it...what could I do to reach all of their hearts?  I prayed again, then picked up a crinkled-up tin foil ball that was on the floor and asked Little Bug if he wanted to play catch with me.  He lit up and ran to his bean bag to play.  We were laughing and having a grand time playing catch, Muffin was smiling as she watched us, and soon Little Bear came running in to join the fun.  We played for 20 minutes until it was time to get dinner started.

And the scripture that keeps running through my head is Matthew 25:37-40:

 37 Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink?

 38 When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee?

 39 Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee?

 40 And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.

Happy Challenge:

Is there one of the "least of these" in your life that you could spend a few extra minutes with today?  Nothing arduously planned out or expensive, just some simple love shown in a simple way.

 

image via pinterest

Unto the Least of These.

Love is simple, really.  Sometimes it just takes a minute to show just a little extra love.  Like the day not too long ago that after getting my little muffin girl out of her crib, we sat together on the rocking chair for nearly 15 minutes and just rocked.  I gave her a tickle on her arms and legs and face and she sat absolutely motionless.  It was a tender experience for me and I thought how sad it would have been if I had passed over this opportunity and rushed off to the next activity on my to-do list.

Or the day when instead of rushing off to get myself ready, I sat a few extra minutes with my sweetheart on the couch as he studied his scriptures.  He put his arm around me and I snuggled into him.  How tragic if I had missed this small moment of joy.

Or yesterday when my Little Bug was having a hard, tearful day.  He wouldn't talk to me at all about what was bothering him, but just laid on the floor all melancholy.  I prayed as I do every time I have no idea how to reach my little ones' hearts, asking the Father what I should do.  And then an idea came.  "Mommy really needs to blow her nose, it feels all stuffy.  But what should I use to blow my nose?"  No response came from the sad little pile on the floor.  So I continued.  "Maybe...I should use my hairbrush to blow my nose!  Is that a good idea?"  A little grin pulled the corners of his lips upward ever so slightly.  He shook his head just a tiny bit.  "Oh.  Well, then maybe I could use a spoon!  Would that be a good idea?"  This time the smile was real and he shook his head vigorously from his post on the floor.  I continued to suggest silly things until finally I asked him what I should use.  He replied, "Maybe....a paper towel!"  We continued the conversation, me asking him where I could find one and he responding and showing me step by step.  After realizing they were all gone, we had to find more and then the roll wouldn't go on so he showed me how to remove the old tube before trying to put on the new one.  By the time I finally blew my nose, he was full-out laughing and had completely forgotten about whatever it was that was bothering him.

Or lastly, yesterday afternoon when the boredom bug had crept into the household.  Little Bear was playing the iPod and Little Bug was loving Miss Muffin just a little too much.  She was not liking it...what could I do to reach all of their hearts?  I prayed again, then picked up a crinkled-up tin foil ball that was on the floor and asked Little Bug if he wanted to play catch with me.  He lit up and ran to his bean bag to play.  We were laughing and having a grand time playing catch, Muffin was smiling as she watched us, and soon Little Bear came running in to join the fun.  We played for 20 minutes until it was time to get dinner started.

And the scripture that keeps running through my head is Matthew 25:37-40:

 37 Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink?

 38 When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee?

 39 Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee?

 40 And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.

Happy Challenge:

Is there one of the "least of these" in your life that you could spend a few extra minutes with today?  Nothing arduously planned out or expensive, just some simple love shown in a simple way.

 

image via pinterest

Happy Challenges.

When I first started this blog, my desire was to help others, and to help myself, find the best and happiest things in life.  I ended some of my posts with a "happy challenge," basically a dare to go out and discover some happiness within yourself, your relationships, or the world around you.

And because I loved these little challenges and the adventure of it all, I'll be including one again at the end of every post and a whole list once a week on Mondays...because reading in and of itself isn't enough to produce happiness,  
but doing is.

So, for today, here is a list of happy challenges for you to choose from.  Or even go out and create your own.  Will you take the risk?  For choosing to happify ourselves always involves a bit of risk, but only a risk to leave the state of satisfactory and find the comfort of true contentment.

Today's List of 18 Happy Challenges:

*Make a list of some of the things that make you happy.  Choose one thing and do it!
*Take a step outside, close your eyes, and take 10 deep breaths.  Then open your eyes and see the beauty around you.
*Find a favorite song you own, or one you wish you had (on grooveshare.com or playlist.com) then listen to it twice.
*Do 25 push-ups or 50 crunches or a set of both.
*Eat your favorite treat.  Be present while you eat.
*Find something healthy that you normally don't eat and try it.  Try to savor each bite.
*Meditate for 10 minutes about everything and nothing.  Let you mind take a little mental vacation.
*Take a photo of one thing beautiful and share it with someone.
*Take a lap around the house--or 2 or 3.
*Fall asleep after lunch for a short power nap.
*Take 5 minutes (or 45) and curl up with that book you've been meaning to get to.
*Call your mother just to tell her you love her.
*When you give your loved one a hug today, hold it tight for just a few seconds longer than normal.
*Sit up straight--don't slouch.
*Write that thank you card you've had on the back of your mind for some time now.
*Sing a song when you're alone sometime today--in the shower, driving home from work, on a walk, in your closet...
*Make a handmade gift for someone's birthday or just because.
*Sit and just be still.

Now, go and do one!  Leave a comment with the challenge you chose and the happiness it brought you...good luck!

Happy Challenges.

When I first started this blog, my desire was to help others, and to help myself, find the best and happiest things in life.  I ended some of my posts with a "happy challenge," basically a dare to go out and discover some happiness within yourself, your relationships, or the world around you.

And because I loved these little challenges and the adventure of it all, I'll be including one again at the end of every post and a whole list once a week on Mondays...because reading in and of itself isn't enough to produce happiness,  
but doing is.

So, for today, here is a list of happy challenges for you to choose from.  Or even go out and create your own.  Will you take the risk?  For choosing to happify ourselves always involves a bit of risk, but only a risk to leave the state of satisfactory and find the comfort of true contentment.

Today's List of 18 Happy Challenges:

*Make a list of some of the things that make you happy.  Choose one thing and do it!
*Take a step outside, close your eyes, and take 10 deep breaths.  Then open your eyes and see the beauty around you.
*Find a favorite song you own, or one you wish you had (on grooveshare.com or playlist.com) then listen to it twice.
*Do 25 push-ups or 50 crunches or a set of both.
*Eat your favorite treat.  Be present while you eat.
*Find something healthy that you normally don't eat and try it.  Try to savor each bite.
*Meditate for 10 minutes about everything and nothing.  Let you mind take a little mental vacation.
*Take a photo of one thing beautiful and share it with someone.
*Take a lap around the house--or 2 or 3.
*Fall asleep after lunch for a short power nap.
*Take 5 minutes (or 45) and curl up with that book you've been meaning to get to.
*Call your mother just to tell her you love her.
*When you give your loved one a hug today, hold it tight for just a few seconds longer than normal.
*Sit up straight--don't slouch.
*Write that thank you card you've had on the back of your mind for some time now.
*Sing a song when you're alone sometime today--in the shower, driving home from work, on a walk, in your closet...
*Make a handmade gift for someone's birthday or just because.
*Sit and just be still.

Now, go and do one!  Leave a comment with the challenge you chose and the happiness it brought you...good luck!

Finding Light {My Battle Part 2}

It was towards the end of March that I finally decided to reach out for help.  My husband had asked me on numerous occasions if I wanted him to call my mom and seek out a doctor.  I turned him down each time, believing that I would get better if I just gave it more time.

I had tried exercising more frequently, changing my daily routine a dozen times, eliminating distracting activities...the list went on and on.  And while each of these solutions were good and should have helped, they didn't.  I realized that it was my body's hormones and not my external factors that needed a revamp.

But there were so many days that I wished I didn't even exist...for no tangible, logical reason.  My life was perfect, but I felt in the depths of despair.  Even the warm spring and the sunshine outside, which usually served to bolster me and fuel my joy, only made me feel like crawling up in a corner to cry.  The worst part of the depression seemed to hit me in the mornings.  Every morning the weight of the day would hit me like a ton of bricks the second I opened my eyes.  Sleep was my only escape from the terrible feelings of guilt, sadness, and despair.

In the last week of March I finally accepted my sweetheart's suggestions.  He called my mom because I was too sad to admit that I was depressed.  She immediately reached out and called me.  She found a doctor and I set up an appointment.  This was the turning point for me.  She prescribed a serotonin re-uptake inhibitor and I began faithfully taking the medicine.  It took a few weeks to fully kick-in, so to speak, but I found myself experiencing fewer and fewer bad days as time went on.

I continued to practice life-enhancing habits and did my best to eat and drink right.  I began taking afternoon naps with my little ones and found my days gradually normalizing.  I remember in April there was a day that I finally felt like my normal self.  At first these days were sporadic and unpredictable, but eventually they became the majority.

In May I noticed progress.  I noted that my afternoons began to be happier, and little by little, the hour got earlier that I would begin feeling happy.  Noon for a few days, then 11:00, then 10:00.  By June--I hit a landmark.  I was finally waking up happy.  I waited a few weeks and started to feel like my normal self again.  I am just now tapering off the medication and it feels so wonderful to be alive.

While the medication was definitely a catalyst in my progress, there was a spiritual power that activated it.  I truly learned how to call on my Heavenly Father moment by moment for grace and strength beyond my own to face the feats before me.  It was revolutionary and it has changed me forever...this calling upon Him for grace.  Early this year I had been contemplating how I could come to know my Savior better.  Truly, this was the answer.

Do I feel embarrassed, saddened, or bitter that this whole experience of postpartum depression happened to me?  No. 

Though it was excruciatingly difficult, I know that the Lord pulled me from the abyss.  As I learned to rely on Him more, and use the resources He put in my path, my burden was lifted.  And now as I gaze out at the sunlight falling on the summer countryside, I am truly happy.  And I know that even though I feel much like my normal self, I will never be exactly the same.  I am different now.  More refined, stronger than I was, and perhaps, a little more like Him.

Finding Light {My Battle Part 2}

It was towards the end of March that I finally decided to reach out for help.  My husband had asked me on numerous occasions if I wanted him to call my mom and seek out a doctor.  I turned him down each time, believing that I would get better if I just gave it more time.

I had tried exercising more frequently, changing my daily routine a dozen times, eliminating distracting activities...the list went on and on.  And while each of these solutions were good and should have helped, they didn't.  I realized that it was my body's hormones and not my external factors that needed a revamp.

But there were so many days that I wished I didn't even exist...for no tangible, logical reason.  My life was perfect, but I felt in the depths of despair.  Even the warm spring and the sunshine outside, which usually served to bolster me and fuel my joy, only made me feel like crawling up in a corner to cry.  The worst part of the depression seemed to hit me in the mornings.  Every morning the weight of the day would hit me like a ton of bricks the second I opened my eyes.  Sleep was my only escape from the terrible feelings of guilt, sadness, and despair.

In the last week of March I finally accepted my sweetheart's suggestions.  He called my mom because I was too sad to admit that I was depressed.  She immediately reached out and called me.  She found a doctor and I set up an appointment.  This was the turning point for me.  She prescribed a serotonin re-uptake inhibitor and I began faithfully taking the medicine.  It took a few weeks to fully kick-in, so to speak, but I found myself experiencing fewer and fewer bad days as time went on.

I continued to practice life-enhancing habits and did my best to eat and drink right.  I began taking afternoon naps with my little ones and found my days gradually normalizing.  I remember in April there was a day that I finally felt like my normal self.  At first these days were sporadic and unpredictable, but eventually they became the majority.

In May I noticed progress.  I noted that my afternoons began to be happier, and little by little, the hour got earlier that I would begin feeling happy.  Noon for a few days, then 11:00, then 10:00.  By June--I hit a landmark.  I was finally waking up happy.  I waited a few weeks and started to feel like my normal self again.  I am just now tapering off the medication and it feels so wonderful to be alive.

While the medication was definitely a catalyst in my progress, there was a spiritual power that activated it.  I truly learned how to call on my Heavenly Father moment by moment for grace and strength beyond my own to face the feats before me.  It was revolutionary and it has changed me forever...this calling upon Him for grace.  Early this year I had been contemplating how I could come to know my Savior better.  Truly, this was the answer.

Do I feel embarrassed, saddened, or bitter that this whole experience of postpartum depression happened to me?  No. 

Though it was excruciatingly difficult, I know that the Lord pulled me from the abyss.  As I learned to rely on Him more, and use the resources He put in my path, my burden was lifted.  And now as I gaze out at the sunlight falling on the summer countryside, I am truly happy.  And I know that even though I feel much like my normal self, I will never be exactly the same.  I am different now.  More refined, stronger than I was, and perhaps, a little more like Him.

The Dark Days {My Battle Part 1}

{image via pinterest}

It was sometime in the middle of February that it hit me. Like a ton of bricks crashing down on my inner peace.  It was the bane of postpartum depression.

My little angel girl was born at the end of November, shortly after my younger sister got married and my sweet mother underwent a major thoracotomy (lung surgery).  And though the first few months of juggling two rowdy boys and a brand new infant were trying, life was peaceful and exciting.

In December we moved to a new state and into a beautiful, antique, renovated farmhouse cottage.  Christmas came and we gathered our little ones around our tree in love and joy.

In January my sweetheart began his second to last affiliation in a city about 45 minutes from our house, and simultaneously threw himself into intensive study for his boards of physical therapy which we would be taking in March.  We began desperately searching for a job, knowing that he would graduate in May and we would need some way to provide for our growing family.  I tried to deal with these circumstances the best I knew how, but one day, I finally just snapped.

It was too much stress, too much pressure, too many new changes and worries.  I tried to ignore the feelings of depression I was having.  I tried to shrug them off and be happy anyway.  I tried to be the best mother I could be, and a support to my husband.  I tried to perform my regular duties with a positive attitude.  But nothing was working.  I didn't want anyone to know I was struggling, for fear they would think I was a failure, or that I wasn't strong enough to handle three children.

Life came and went for the next several months.  Stresses intensified when my husband felt like he had failed his boards and we anticipated the awful waiting until July for the next licensure exam, wondering how we would ever support our family when our loan money ran out in May.  But things resolved themselves, as they often do.  The Lord gave us tender mercy after tender mercy.  My sweetheart miraculously passed his boards, he was given a promising job, and things began to turn brighter--externally.  But internally I was still battling an immense amount of sadness that I couldn't explain.

What was I to do?  Where was I to turn?  I felt like I had fallen in a deep, dark hole that I couldn't climb out of, no matter how hard I tried.  Would I ever be free?  Would I ever feel like my normal, enthusiastic, in love with life, happy self?

{And for fear that this post is getting too long, I will finish my story in tomorrow's post....}

The Dark Days {My Battle Part 1}

{image via pinterest}

It was sometime in the middle of February that it hit me. Like a ton of bricks crashing down on my inner peace.  It was the bane of postpartum depression.

My little angel girl was born at the end of November, shortly after my younger sister got married and my sweet mother underwent a major thoracotomy (lung surgery).  And though the first few months of juggling two rowdy boys and a brand new infant were trying, life was peaceful and exciting.

In December we moved to a new state and into a beautiful, antique, renovated farmhouse cottage.  Christmas came and we gathered our little ones around our tree in love and joy.

In January my sweetheart began his second to last affiliation in a city about 45 minutes from our house, and simultaneously threw himself into intensive study for his boards of physical therapy which we would be taking in March.  We began desperately searching for a job, knowing that he would graduate in May and we would need some way to provide for our growing family.  I tried to deal with these circumstances the best I knew how, but one day, I finally just snapped.

It was too much stress, too much pressure, too many new changes and worries.  I tried to ignore the feelings of depression I was having.  I tried to shrug them off and be happy anyway.  I tried to be the best mother I could be, and a support to my husband.  I tried to perform my regular duties with a positive attitude.  But nothing was working.  I didn't want anyone to know I was struggling, for fear they would think I was a failure, or that I wasn't strong enough to handle three children.

Life came and went for the next several months.  Stresses intensified when my husband felt like he had failed his boards and we anticipated the awful waiting until July for the next licensure exam, wondering how we would ever support our family when our loan money ran out in May.  But things resolved themselves, as they often do.  The Lord gave us tender mercy after tender mercy.  My sweetheart miraculously passed his boards, he was given a promising job, and things began to turn brighter--externally.  But internally I was still battling an immense amount of sadness that I couldn't explain.

What was I to do?  Where was I to turn?  I felt like I had fallen in a deep, dark hole that I couldn't climb out of, no matter how hard I tried.  Would I ever be free?  Would I ever feel like my normal, enthusiastic, in love with life, happy self?

{And for fear that this post is getting too long, I will finish my story in tomorrow's post....}

Putting Him First.

Morning comes and I find myself on my knees, supplicating my Heavenly Father for guidance, direction, strength, and grace.  Then I retreat to my chocolate-brown couch to curl up in a fuzzy blanket and read His word.  From this vantage point I can see to the left my beloved painting of Christ walking on the water and to the right, the serene countryside through the picture window.  This is my time with the Lord, and I treasure each minute.  With young children who wake up early, it isn't long (only 30 short minutes), but I strive to make it quality time.  The morning hours, are to me, so quiet and still and ripe with promise of a beautiful day.  It is in the stillness that I feel closest to my Father and can introspectively examine the state of my heart.  Despite how tired I feel each morning as I awake and contemplate another busy day with small children, this one practice of a morning devotional has greatly blessed my life.  It is worth the sacrifice of a little sleep.

It hasn't always been this way.  Since the time I was young, I have always tried to spend time in the words of scripture, but because of changing times and seasons, it hasn't always been first thing in the morning, and it hasn't always been for the same amount of time.  It has been quite a journey to finding the perfect way for "me" to feast on His word, but I can attest that for now, this way of physically putting Him first as well as mentally, is the way He has led me.

We are all different, and our schedules and demands placed on our time differ as well.  But one thing can be common among the host of Christ's disciples.  We can strive to always put Him first.  We can soak in His word and meditate upon it throughout the day.  We can teach what we learn to our little ones who live at home, or who are all grown up and living away from home.

And now, some of the practices that have helped me strengthen my own spirituality daily are as follows:

*In my morning prayer, I ask the Father to bless me with inspiration to apply what I will read to the day's needs.
*I purchase an inexpensive copy of the scriptures each year so that as I read each day I can mark them up and write in the margins what impresses me and how the verses apply to my current situation.  In this way, my scriptures become a sort of study journal for me to go back and reflect on how far I've come.
*I leave the scriptures open on the coffee table to one of the pages I have studied and marked so that each time I pass, I am reminded to glance down and remember the words I have studied for the day.
*I pray to follow what I have read often throughout the day.
*My husband and I take a minute to share with each other what we learned before we go to bed.
*I strive to share with my little ones a simplified version of some of the principles I have learned.


May we each have the courage to search within our hearts and ask the Father if we are truly putting Him first in our lives.  I know He will shower down His blessings upon us as we do so.

Putting Him First.

Morning comes and I find myself on my knees, supplicating my Heavenly Father for guidance, direction, strength, and grace.  Then I retreat to my chocolate-brown couch to curl up in a fuzzy blanket and read His word.  From this vantage point I can see to the left my beloved painting of Christ walking on the water and to the right, the serene countryside through the picture window.  This is my time with the Lord, and I treasure each minute.  With young children who wake up early, it isn't long (only 30 short minutes), but I strive to make it quality time.  The morning hours, are to me, so quiet and still and ripe with promise of a beautiful day.  It is in the stillness that I feel closest to my Father and can introspectively examine the state of my heart.  Despite how tired I feel each morning as I awake and contemplate another busy day with small children, this one practice of a morning devotional has greatly blessed my life.  It is worth the sacrifice of a little sleep.

It hasn't always been this way.  Since the time I was young, I have always tried to spend time in the words of scripture, but because of changing times and seasons, it hasn't always been first thing in the morning, and it hasn't always been for the same amount of time.  It has been quite a journey to finding the perfect way for "me" to feast on His word, but I can attest that for now, this way of physically putting Him first as well as mentally, is the way He has led me.

We are all different, and our schedules and demands placed on our time differ as well.  But one thing can be common among the host of Christ's disciples.  We can strive to always put Him first.  We can soak in His word and meditate upon it throughout the day.  We can teach what we learn to our little ones who live at home, or who are all grown up and living away from home.

And now, some of the practices that have helped me strengthen my own spirituality daily are as follows:

*In my morning prayer, I ask the Father to bless me with inspiration to apply what I will read to the day's needs.
*I purchase an inexpensive copy of the scriptures each year so that as I read each day I can mark them up and write in the margins what impresses me and how the verses apply to my current situation.  In this way, my scriptures become a sort of study journal for me to go back and reflect on how far I've come.
*I leave the scriptures open on the coffee table to one of the pages I have studied and marked so that each time I pass, I am reminded to glance down and remember the words I have studied for the day.
*I pray to follow what I have read often throughout the day.
*My husband and I take a minute to share with each other what we learned before we go to bed.
*I strive to share with my little ones a simplified version of some of the principles I have learned.


May we each have the courage to search within our hearts and ask the Father if we are truly putting Him first in our lives.  I know He will shower down His blessings upon us as we do so.

I'm back.

Finally.  Here I am, back from my much-needed Sabbatical.  The winter was long, and spring was bumpy, but I have truly loved every minute of cradling my sweet little baby girl.  She is worth every struggle and turmoil.  I will recount my journey little by little, but for today, may I simply suggest that the Quest for Happiness is enhanced by suffering and trial.  While it never seems like it in the midst of the darkness, we know deep in our hearts that the dawn will come once again, and that knowledge is what sustains us until the happy sunshine rises again in our hearts.

It is through the hills and mountains we climb that we build stamina and muscle and shed the things that hold us down.  And when we reach the top, we feel enlightened and invigorated, and like we have finally found ourselves again.  But with the vast view below, the view of our inner selves is grander and larger as well.  We see who we were down at the bottom of the mountain, and now at the top, we realize we have become so. much. more.

And then we look heavenward and know with certainty that it was all because of Christ's grace that we have reached this point, this pinnacle.  The clouds roll blissfully above, and we reach up, feeling a vibrant connection with Deity.  We are His.  And now we are even closer to being like Him.

image via {pinterest}

Linked to:

I'm back.

Finally.  Here I am, back from my much-needed Sabbatical.  The winter was long, and spring was bumpy, but I have truly loved every minute of cradling my sweet little baby girl.  She is worth every struggle and turmoil.  I will recount my journey little by little, but for today, may I simply suggest that the Quest for Happiness is enhanced by suffering and trial.  While it never seems like it in the midst of the darkness, we know deep in our hearts that the dawn will come once again, and that knowledge is what sustains us until the happy sunshine rises again in our hearts.

It is through the hills and mountains we climb that we build stamina and muscle and shed the things that hold us down.  And when we reach the top, we feel enlightened and invigorated, and like we have finally found ourselves again.  But with the vast view below, the view of our inner selves is grander and larger as well.  We see who we were down at the bottom of the mountain, and now at the top, we realize we have become so. much. more.

And then we look heavenward and know with certainty that it was all because of Christ's grace that we have reached this point, this pinnacle.  The clouds roll blissfully above, and we reach up, feeling a vibrant connection with Deity.  We are His.  And now we are even closer to being like Him.

image via {pinterest}

Linked to: